Customer Profile: Saint Valentine
Everyone is welcome here at the Last Chance Salon. It might surprise you, considering we play host to such as That Guy and the Headless Horseman, that a holy man choose our establishment as his watering hole but, hey, everyone needs a place to kick back.
Val first found us in 1969 when the Powers yanked his day from the general liturgical calendar and he decided to take a… hiatus from his saintly duties. I mean, seriously, dude is a martyred bishop and you suddenly declare his arbitrary non-importance? SMH. Like, until it comes loose.
Then again, he did lose his for trying to convert Claudius. Who also used to come in here and who was a total d-bag. When a pharaoh claims he/she is drinking for two – him/herself and the god he/she incarnates — that’s one thing. When some homely, half-bald dude with syphilitic crazy eye does it? No two of the price of one for you, man.
We still see Val from time to time. Or bits of him anyway. The flower crowned skull is particularly popular with the ladies, the vial of blood with a much more niche crowd but, hey, there’s no accounting for taste (literally) and we make it a policy not to judge.
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