Prediction: Hercules: The Thracian Wars
Shiri’s Prediction: Look, here’s the deal, kids. I LOVE me some Dwayne Johnson. As in “I own The Scorpion King” love. No, I’m not kidding. I own The Scorpion King. I’ve seen enough Hercules adaptations, however, that not even The Rock could lure me to another if it didn’t look decent. And it does. I think. There is, of course, the requisite number of cheesy effects, but I think that’s probably a permanent part of the Greek pseudo-mythology genre at this point. As is announcing who you are at excessively loud volume in dramatic fashion. But the armor is pretty which is generally a good sign and they do seem to have at least taken a quick glance at the source material (giant lion = giant lion hat) which is promising.
I see myself giving it a whirl at the theatre. I mean, if you’re going to watch The Rock shirtless for two hours, he may as well be near life-sized.
Luke’s Prediction: So, my two problems with every other Hercules movie or show ever fall into the two following problems:
- Story. You have the story of a dude taking on 12 of the most legendary quests ever. You have a great story with a god and goddess couple sorting our their martial issues by fucking with some half-god child. You have love, betrayal, anger, everything you could ever want. So, why don’t they ever fucking just do the 12 labors?
- Physical. This is the story of a meat head. The biggest, baddest, strongest, most anger filled, dude ever, EVER. He is the strongest man or god, for fuck’s sake. He holds the sky up, as in the whole freakin’ sky, he holds it up. He changes the course of a river, by hand. He is HERCULES. So, whoever plays him, has to look like he could be the strongest man in the world. Now, I am not saying he needs to be a body builder or something, but he needs to be the largest man on the screen for the whole time and he needs to look the part.
This movie looks like it delivers on both parts, the idea of doing a series of Hercules movies is a great idea. Get two or three of the labors out of the way each time. We can have subplots across movies, this works. I am there.
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